Battered Fries Get Back to Their Roots

from the desk of Robert, the younger Waugh

As if there weren't enough news on our plates these days, a Texas judge has recently agreed with the USDA's ruling that Frozen Fries Are "Fresh" Veggies [Sun-Sentinel] [USA Today]

It's a stunning precedent that will doubtless shake the very foundation of our legal system. What are some other rulings and classifications we should expect to read about in the coming years?

corn dogs

portable handheld devices - cabin attendants will now instruct airline passengers to stow all battered, handheld foodstuffs in an overhead compartment while planes are lifting off and landing

fortune cookies

Chinese literature - now eligible for book rate at U.S. Post Offices

rye bread

granted minority status - rye and pumpernickel varieties should be integrated with loaves of white and wheat on supermarket shelves... with all deliberate speed

Spam

100% recycled material - can now carry the reduce, reuse, recycle logo

kosher dill pickles

religious paraphernalia - no longer served in public school cafeterias

Posted by Robert Waugh at June 17, 2004 04:46 PM